I am aware that check lists are used to measure how things are going. Over the last year, we have stopped tracking Home Teaching visits and moved to a more Christ centered approach to supporting families. But at the same time, I get the feeling we are now tracking Ministering Quarterly Interviews, but that isn't really the point. I know there are times when people use check lists to determine how they are doing and how their family is doing. I am sure all of us have been in classes or heard discussions afterwards about how to measure "success".
Of course we know that that there are certain ordinances that help us progress to getting back to our Heavenly Father; baptism, temple endowment, temple sealing... This has been taught from Primary on up.
Sort of going on my last post; one of the check marks I want to bring up is the RM status. President Monson taught, that every young man should prepare to serve a mission. This is a little different from what I heard growing up, that all young men should serve a mission. Having served in different callings and having a son that has not gone on a mission has made me think more and more on this. What happens if the young man doesn't serve a mission? How is he treated by others? I have known a lot of great men that haven't served a mission.
I have heard in the past that Young Women are taught to look for a return missionary to date and marry. I think a lot of returned missionaries have great qualities. However, I also know that there are some RM's that are not great while other non-missionaries are wonderful. Can we/ do we/ should we/ use the RM status as something to judge others on?
Both of my kids during their middle school and high school years have had some great friends and not so great of friends. They have also had friends who were members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and others who were not. Looking at these, I don't see a correlation between being a good friend and being a member of the church. My daughter dated for about a year (yes, steady dating in HS) a young man who was not a member of our Church. He was one the most respectful and trust worthy young men I have met. And yet, I know of times we have taught that we should only date members of the Church and marry only RM's.
My nephew went on a mission to South America shortly after turning 19. He was there for awhile before injuring his back; his back had been previously injured during high school. He came home for awhile and then was sent to Texas. Again while there his back was hurt. It was determined that it would be difficult to finish his mission and he was released. While dating after coming home, he was told by a girl that she wouldn't date him because he didn't finish his mission. Now this might be an extreme case, but it happens.
My wife was talking to a lady in our Ward. She was saying that she didn't like her daughters boy friend because he hadn't served a mission. We were both surprised because this family has a son that didn't go on a mission. He has continued to go to church and been active and will actually be married in the temple soon.
We had one home teacher that said he would be willing to talk with my son. He said that he knows that if he didn't go on a mission that his wife wouldn't have had anything to do with him back then.
I learned a lot from my mission and I am glad I served. I am not sure where I would be if I had not gone. However, I also feel that missions are not for everyone. There are great RM's and RM's that do not live as worthy or as upstanding as they should. There are also great young men that have not served missions as well as others who are not so great. While it would be great to have a one stop measuring stick, there isn't one.
It is very difficult to not judge. I know that I am guilty of this. However, I am working on being better. I hope that we can be more accepting and look for good qualities in everyone. We are taught by great leaders during conference. They have taught us that we must be more open. We need to reach out to others and bring them in. By doing this, our congregations will be blessed as we are all there to be inspired and come closer to our Father in Heaven. "By their fruits ye shall know them."
My goal should be to obtain qualities as shown by Jesus Christ. In my calling, I should be teaching others to strive for these qualities. We should all be searching for these qualities in others. I hope my children are looking for these qualities in who they want to associate with. Having completed a mission is a great accomplishment and experience; but, it is not a quality.
Of course we know that that there are certain ordinances that help us progress to getting back to our Heavenly Father; baptism, temple endowment, temple sealing... This has been taught from Primary on up.
Sort of going on my last post; one of the check marks I want to bring up is the RM status. President Monson taught, that every young man should prepare to serve a mission. This is a little different from what I heard growing up, that all young men should serve a mission. Having served in different callings and having a son that has not gone on a mission has made me think more and more on this. What happens if the young man doesn't serve a mission? How is he treated by others? I have known a lot of great men that haven't served a mission.
I have heard in the past that Young Women are taught to look for a return missionary to date and marry. I think a lot of returned missionaries have great qualities. However, I also know that there are some RM's that are not great while other non-missionaries are wonderful. Can we/ do we/ should we/ use the RM status as something to judge others on?
Both of my kids during their middle school and high school years have had some great friends and not so great of friends. They have also had friends who were members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and others who were not. Looking at these, I don't see a correlation between being a good friend and being a member of the church. My daughter dated for about a year (yes, steady dating in HS) a young man who was not a member of our Church. He was one the most respectful and trust worthy young men I have met. And yet, I know of times we have taught that we should only date members of the Church and marry only RM's.
My nephew went on a mission to South America shortly after turning 19. He was there for awhile before injuring his back; his back had been previously injured during high school. He came home for awhile and then was sent to Texas. Again while there his back was hurt. It was determined that it would be difficult to finish his mission and he was released. While dating after coming home, he was told by a girl that she wouldn't date him because he didn't finish his mission. Now this might be an extreme case, but it happens.
My wife was talking to a lady in our Ward. She was saying that she didn't like her daughters boy friend because he hadn't served a mission. We were both surprised because this family has a son that didn't go on a mission. He has continued to go to church and been active and will actually be married in the temple soon.
We had one home teacher that said he would be willing to talk with my son. He said that he knows that if he didn't go on a mission that his wife wouldn't have had anything to do with him back then.
I learned a lot from my mission and I am glad I served. I am not sure where I would be if I had not gone. However, I also feel that missions are not for everyone. There are great RM's and RM's that do not live as worthy or as upstanding as they should. There are also great young men that have not served missions as well as others who are not so great. While it would be great to have a one stop measuring stick, there isn't one.
It is very difficult to not judge. I know that I am guilty of this. However, I am working on being better. I hope that we can be more accepting and look for good qualities in everyone. We are taught by great leaders during conference. They have taught us that we must be more open. We need to reach out to others and bring them in. By doing this, our congregations will be blessed as we are all there to be inspired and come closer to our Father in Heaven. "By their fruits ye shall know them."
My goal should be to obtain qualities as shown by Jesus Christ. In my calling, I should be teaching others to strive for these qualities. We should all be searching for these qualities in others. I hope my children are looking for these qualities in who they want to associate with. Having completed a mission is a great accomplishment and experience; but, it is not a quality.
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